6 Ways to Beat Caregiver Burnout

To take care of someone else, you have to take care of yourself too. These expert strategies can help you cope with the stress of caregiving.

Becoming a family caregiver can be very rewarding. But it can also take a toll on your emotional and physical health. More than a third of caregivers feel high emotional stress, according to a 2020 report by the National Alliance for Caregiving.

It's not all bad news, though. In an AARP survey of caregivers, more than 90% said their positive emotions - such as feeling pleased that they can help a loved one - beat out the negative ones.

The key is learning to cope with the challenges and changes. After all, your health - including your emotional well-being - is just as important as your loved one's health.

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What Does Caregiver Burnout Look Like?

These are the signs of trouble to watch for:

• Feelings of hopelessness — like things are never going to get better
• The urge to push people away
• The impulse to stay home and avoid activities you previously enjoyed

If you begin to recognize any of those signs, you may benefit from calling a caregiver support line or joining support group that meets regularly near you. You may also benefit from talking to a therapist or other mental health professional.

Use these strategies to recognize and protect yourself from the main sources of caregiver burnout.

1. Practice Mindfulness

Family caregivers often aren't ready for the feelings of loss that accompany this life-changing situation. The person you're caring for has changed, and the future you planned may suddenly look very different. You may also be facing a loss of free time or a different financial footing.

Instead of trying to shove those emotions aside. Acknowledge them. Mindfulness, which is the practice of being in the moment without judgement, can help you work through those perfectly normal feelings.

Start by setting aside 10 to 30 minutes of quiet time for yourself every day. You can go for a meditative walk, write in a journal, or simply sit outside and take a few deep breaths.

2. Stay Connected

There's nothing like talking to a peer who knows exactly what you're going through. Now is the time to lean on your relationships. Having a strong support system gives you an outlet and a place to get tips, share ideas, learn, vent, laugh, and cry.

Look for ways to stay in touch with your friends, even if meetups for coffee need to turn into text exchanges or Facetime calls. It can also be helpful to join peer support groups. Talking to others who share a similar experience can ease some of the pressure. Support groups can be online or in person.

To find one:

• Ask your care recipient’s medical team.
• Google “area agency on aging” or “caregiver support hotline.”
• Search Facebook or other social media.

3. Take Movement Breaks

Caregiving is stressful. Without breaks, your body will go into fight-or-flight mode when you feel overwhelmed. That sets off a chemical cascade that can lead to serious health consequences if your body stays in fight-or-flight mode for long periods of time.

A few minutes of exercise and physical activity can make a difference. (Fitness experts even have a name for this — movement snacks.)

You don't need to hit the gym - or even break a sweat. What matters is that you find something that's fun, gets your muscles moving, and helps take your mind off your to-do list.

Ten minutes is a good start. Some ideas:

• Dance to your favorite song while a meal cooks.
• Do some gentle neck and shoulder stretches.
• Do a Standing Sun Salutations yoga sequence (this one is a FREE SilverSneakers On-Demand class).
• Go up a set of stairs as fast as you can.
• Head outside and kick or throw a ball around.

4. Learn to Delegate

Newsflash: People like to help others. So if someone asks you if they can help, don't turn them down. And don't be shy about asking others if they can pitch in.

Take a moment to create a list of tasks you can hand off to others to free you up mentally and physically. It doesn't have to be direct care. Folding laundry, putting gas in the car, ordering grocery delivery, are just a few ideas for things other people can probably take on for you.

5. Build Empathy and Patience

As roles shift, it can be easy to lose sight of how difficult the situation is for your loved one. Try to understand what it's like to for them to lose some of their independence.

And resist the urge to do and speak for them. Ask their medical team what tasks they can lead for themselves. You will likely need to set up new systems and routines but giving them some ownership of their environment will help both of you in the long run.

Toward this end, it’s important to learn everything you can about their condition and make sure you fully understand their treatment plan.

6. Celebrate Small Victories

Did you find time today to work on a hobby or take a walk? Win! Did your loved one manage a personal task without difficulty? ¡Gane!

Victories like this may seem tiny, but they’re worth recognizing and, yes, celebrating.

In caregiver surveys, one of the biggest things people say they didn't expect when they become caregivers is how rewarding the work can be. That's where you will find meaning in this new role you've taken on.

In the AARP survey mentioned at the beginning of this article, the majority of respondents also said they found unexpected joy in caregiving. To do that, you need to stay on the lookout for the silver-lining moments that will keep you going and give you meaning in the work you're doing.

See our sources:
National Alliance for Caregiving and AARP Family Caregiving in the U.S. 2020 Research Report
AARP Family Caregiving Survey: Caregivers’ Reflections on Changing Roles
Mindfulness based stress reduction for family caregivers: Gerontologist

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